July 2026: Surviving is Also Winning

Week 1

The month started with a lot of stress and anxiety carrying over from the previous month. For this month, I wanted to clock in my mandatory hours at work during the first half itself. So, from July 1st, you could see me dragging my sleep-deprived and anxious ass to work every single day…

Because of the limited shuttle availability, I was forced to stay in the office much longer than necessary every day. At work, I was quite productive; still working on a complicated roadmap, planning things that I may or may not get the chance to work on…

The re-org hadn’t happened yet, but just the talk of it was giving me so much stress. I was never afraid to go the extra mile for excellence, but after consistently running those “extra miles” for years and getting nothing in return, I had to draw a boundary somewhere. I had to stand up for my own physical and mental well-being.

After spending such long hours at work, six hours of sleep wasn’t enough to heal my body or my mind. I felt tired from morning till night. By the weekend, I was supposed to take a few interviews, but nobody turned up. Ironically, I was relieved because I had no energy to get out of bed or do anything at all.

I spent the entire weekend in bed, occasionally getting up only to have my meals. I was down with a mild fever, and I resented myself for not taking better care of my health.

I also started watching a new K-drama called Misaeng, a workplace-centric drama. Given my current situation at work, I found it incredibly relatable.

Towards the end of the week, I took some medicine for the fever and somehow mustered enough energy to finish a few household chores and do something for my self-improvement journey.

By the end of the week, I received some communication from work. The re-org situation was still unresolved, bursting the bubble of my temporary relief. I found myself hyper-focusing on small, everyday tasks just to keep my nerves calm; to stop myself from becoming emotionally numb under the weight of an uncertain, and possibly unfavorable, future.

Week 2

The second week was quite overwhelming. There was constant back-and-forth between senior managers regarding the re-org. Eventually, I shifted my focus from what was beyond my control to what I could do to improve my situation in the long run, even if the results wouldn’t be immediate.

I desperately wanted to succeed, but I could no longer afford to be afraid of failure either. All my life, I have taken calculated steps, rarely wondering what my life might have looked like if I had pushed myself a little harder or dared to see the bigger picture.

The weekend was rather busy, filled with interviews for job seekers. Even though some of them were decent candidates, I had to reject them because of the strict requirements that had to be met.

Towards the end of the second week, I went to the office for a couple of days.

It all felt so exhausting.

Week 3

The third week was a busy one. Wrapping up office work before taking just one day off somehow felt like a big accomplishment.

There was a sudden client requirement in Canada that came out of nowhere. I still had to clear the client interview, but since a few candidates had already failed and my previous work experience and education aligned well with the job description, my supervisor asked if I was interested.

Just a few years ago, I would have been on cloud nine for an opportunity like this.

Now… I felt nothing.

My career progression has been painstakingly slow, even though I worked hard at my job while completing both my postgraduate diploma and my master’s degree alongside it. I was already disappointed that I couldn’t take my family to my graduation ceremony, yet saying “No” to this opportunity was a complete no-brainer considering my current situation. I couldn’t possibly attribute that decision to just marriage or my parents’ declining health. It was much bigger than that.

The weekend was long, yet it passed by so quickly.

For a Friday flight, I packed my bags on Thursday; that was a first for me. I am usually very thorough with packing. I normally take several days to plan and execute the entire process, giving myself enough time to remember every must-have and every nice-to-have item for the trip.

I had intentionally booked both flights during the daytime so the journey would be more comfortable for the two female passengers: my mother and me.

Despite sending emails well in advance, we couldn’t secure accommodation at the college guest house. My next best option was a hotel in the same neighborhood where I used to work in Hyderabad many years ago. Yes, it meant a one-hour car ride to the college, but I felt comfortable booking a place where we had stayed several times during the early years of my career.

As we flew to Hyderabad, my mind was filled with nostalgia and hope. After all, this is the only place, apart from my hometown, where I have truly lived. The city continues to grow every single year.

The night before graduation, I felt strangely restless, though I couldn’t quite figure out why.

On the day of the ceremony, Mum and I had a hearty breakfast at the hotel. We even went for a short walk because my mother had complained of indigestion the previous night.

And after all that… The moment I got into the cab for the college, I started feeling unwell.

We lost valuable time negotiating with cab drivers who demanded two or three times the app’s suggested fare. I genuinely wasn’t sure whether I would even make it to the stage to receive my degree.

But help arrived just in time.

I reached the venue and made it to the stage with only minutes to spare.

The college looked packed. More than a thousand students were graduating that day. Students, families, professors, and guests filled the campus; walking around, chatting, and clicking pictures.

We needed to find a cab back to the hotel immediately after the ceremony because we didn’t feel comfortable traveling after dark, especially with the surge in demand.

Then it started raining.

I never got the chance to explore the campus with my mother; for the first time, and probably the last.

Somehow, we managed to find a cab and made it safely back to the hotel.

The next morning, we headed home.

Another flight and a couple of cab rides later, we found ourselves sitting around our dining table, treating ourselves to a simple home-cooked meal.

The work week resumed before I even had the chance to process everything.

I was back to office work, with no time to truly pause and celebrate three years of hard work, perseverance, and finally earning my degree.

Week 4

The last week of the month was everything and nothing at the same time.

I still had to go to the office for a couple of days, write a bunch of tests, and visit our Guruji, who was in town after almost a year.

The weather stayed mostly cloudy, with scattered showers throughout the week.

Even though I resumed work immediately after my short trip, my health never truly recovered. I constantly felt feverish, with occasional headaches and a lingering fatigue that refused to go away no matter how many hours I slept.

At first, I assumed it was simply because my mother and I had exhausted ourselves during the trip.

Between my health, the weather, office work, and the tests, I decided to prioritize the truly non-negotiable things first. My progress at work remained good, but I couldn’t devote nearly as much time to studying as I had hoped.

This month, I had intentionally taken my name off the recruitment drive. While the extra income certainly helped, and I genuinely enjoyed interacting with candidates, I desperately needed to reclaim my weekends; to rest and to work on my own personal goals.

As the month slowly drew to a close, my health deteriorated further.

That lingering feverish feeling and constant fatigue finally manifested into a full-blown flu. The rest of my family was already battling different stages of the same.

During the weekend, Guruji arrived in town, and we visited him along with many other disciples. We were fortunate enough to have Guruji with us during the auspicious occasion of Guru Purnima this year.

For the last couple of days of the month, I finally took some time off to rest.

I couldn’t work.

I couldn’t study.

I couldn’t be productive in any meaningful way.

And I accepted that.

It was simply my body’s way of telling me—

“I can’t go on anymore if you don’t give me this rest right now.”

July 2026 at a glimpse.

The Featured Image: The neighborhood around our hotel was adorned with Gulmohar (Krishnachura/Royal Poinciana/Flame Tree) trees in full bloom. The gentle breeze and those fiery red flowers healed my heart in ways words could never fully explain.
After landing in Hyderabad and checking into our hotel, I ordered a simple meal of steamed rice, plain dal, and a side of paneer curry. We still had some stuffed rotis packed by my dad that morning, but after such a long day of travel, that warm, comforting meal was exactly what we needed. The older I get, the more I realize that it is the simple things; not the flashy ones; that become truly precious.
On our first night in Hyderabad, I ordered a pizza. It was most likely my mum’s first-ever restaurant pizza. She had eaten pizza before whenever my sister or I baked one at home, but never one ordered from a restaurant. Watching her experience something so ordinary for many people somehow made the evening feel a little more special
The next day, we ordered vegetable sandwiches, and they turned out to be surprisingly good. Better yet, it was my mum’s first time trying both a sandwich and French fries! Staying at a pure vegetarian hotel was also a huge relief. She could enjoy every meal without worrying about cross-contamination with meat.
On our last night in Hyderabad, we ordered Chinese-style fried rice with a side of vegetables. My mum would protest every time I picked up the phone to call room service, but deep down, we both knew the truth: Rice is the answer to a lot of questions.
Before leaving for the trip, I had baked a chocolate cake using a boxed cake mix so we’d have something to snack on during our travels. While my homemade chocolate cake recipe still holds the top spot, this one comfortably earned second place.
I clicked the photo of the flower when we went to visit our Guruji in a peaceful suburban area surrounded by lush greenery.
And finally… the box of twelve Krispy Kreme doughnuts I picked up at the airport. We don’t have a Krispy Kreme outlet where I live, so bringing home a box has become a little tradition whenever I travel.